Wednesday, April 28, 2010

soul mates


intothair

We first met when I was 14.

I was crossing the road, and you saw me.

You told your brother to stop the car, right there, in the middle of the road, came down, looked at me, smiled, gave me your card and said "Call me".

I wanted to, but I didn't.

The second time we met, was when I was 15.

I was with my cousins that day, watching the squatter houses getting torn down, and you were there.

You stood on the huge rock, and looked down at me.

I felt someone staring at me, so I turned to look.. and there you were, smiling at me but I looked away.

When I was about to leave, I saw you walking my way, but then the fireman that was there, came over to talk to me just a few seconds before you.. you looked at me, turned and left.

A few months later, we spoke for the very first time.

Yes, I decided to call you and our conversation lasted 2 hours.

We told each other our likes, dislikes, and found out that we had a lot in common.

The next week, I was walking back home, and I saw you on your scooter. With a girl. And you were holding her hand so tightly, it was as though you were never going to let go.

I reached home... sat down.. and all of a sudden...pain rushed through my entire body.. but I didn't cry.. all I could do was think to myself, why does this hurt so much? why did seeing him on his scooter with a girl hurt me so badly? why?

Then I realized.

Even after the first time we met, when you gave me your card, i couldn't stop thinking of you, and that smile of yours.

Did I fall in love? Maybe.

After that day, I saw you with her, everyday and so, I did what was best. I moved on.

5 years went by without thinking of you. I literally managed to block you out of my mind and my life, and life, was going pretty swell for me.

College started, new friends were made, and a loving boyfriend of 3 years was in my life. Life was a bliss.

Semester break came along, and I decided to head home for the month.. and one day, during a walk, I saw you... and you saw me.. you ran across the road and said "Hi!".. all i could do was smile.

Why couldn't I just turn and walk away? It was like my feet were glued to the ground the minute you smiled.

You asked how I was, and I said great.

The next question was "Boyfriend?" I answered "Yes".. you said "Oh" and walked away like you did everytime you heard something you didn't like.

I called out to you and said we can be friends and you smiled and agreed.

We started hanging out a lot. Movies, drinks, surfing, live band shows. You called me up one evening and said to come over to the usual place. i told you I'd be there in 10.

When i arrived, you were up on stage.. That was a normal thing, since you were in a band. You sang Faithfully by Journey and at the end, you said that it was for me.

I froze.

What were you thinking?

what was I thinking?

I had a boyfriend.

Then I snapped back to my reality.

What was happening?

We said we'd be friends. But.. did something happen along the way?

When I woke up that night, I found you next to me. I got out of bed, on to the balcony, and had a cigarette. Shit. I had done something I swore never to do. cheat. Then you came out, and we had a huge argument. the next thing you did, made me blow up.

You called my boyfriend. and told him everything.

He left me. I left you. you sent me a text saying "I hate you", i replied with "Thank you for coming into my life and ruining everything and for making me so blinded that I actually slept with you"

I never heard from you again.

All I could think of after that was what the hell was i thinking? What in the world made me sleep with you? why did I throw away a perfectly good relationship for you? but I didn't put the blame on you. I blamed myself. for being so stupid.

10 years after that day, i'm happily married, with a beautiful daughter, and by the power of facebook, you found me. I accepted your friend request and then while chatting one day, you asked me, what happened to us.

You told me you never forgot me, how my hair smelt after being washed, how I laughed, how I made you happy, how you felt complete when I was next to you.

i told you I never forgot you either. especially your smile.

You said let's run away together. I said no. you're married. I'm married. that's the way it should be.

you said it wasn't.

you said we were soul-mates.

All i said was

"We are soul-mates that weren't meant to end up together. If we had started at the very beginning, we might have been together for a lifetime"


you said maybe in our next lifetime.

i told you that in our next lifetime, when you stop the car in the middle of the road, don't give me your card. just say "Will you be mine".

You agreed but said "I'll just say Will you marry me"

We laughed.

Yes. we are soul-mates, we're not together, but we never forgot one another.

87 comments:

Caitlin said...

Perfect.

Mikaela said...

i really liked that one :)

love, S said...

Ooo wow... I can feel this one shaking my bones... <3

kelly layne said...

this literally made me tear up a bit.

heartsandtruths said...

Wow. Such a unique perspective on the idea of soulmates, and written in such a heart-achingly beautiful way.

Amazing.

Anonymous said...

I'm saving this for the day I feel ready to tell him the same thing.

Never forget.

And just so I'm not kidding myself... it'll be the day when he's ready to hear it, too.

Shiseiten said...

That was incredibly beautiful. It's all about timing. It is clear to me that it will always be about timing. Thank you for sharing such a beautifully heartbreaking story.

Anonymous said...

I love it but I hate it at the same time. It's hard to believe that you and your soulmate are not meant to be together.

Thank you.

It made me look at things from a different perspective.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing this story.. really touched my heart! I am asking myself if soulmates are ending married? I think not every time, right guys?

Anonymous said...

Does nobody realize she is essentially emotionally cheating on her husband in that last conversation they share? That's messed up

Nabiha said...

I Think She Would Cheat On Her Husband One Day With This Guy , That's So Obvious .

Anonymous said...

a wonderful story :) the first time I like a story on lelove so much :)
http://lovers-shore.blogspot.com

Karoline said...

I am agree,it is somehow emotionally cheating on her husband, maybe they really are meant to be, maybe she should just let it happend.

Jags said...

im speechless...

Anonymous said...

kind of feel sorry for your husband

Anonymous said...

Sorry for my English but do all soulmates meant to end up together?
end up to get marry?
I am not quite sure.. and soulmate is surely something relative! we are growing and we are changing.. so that says a lot, I think.
Always the feelings of the first crash, of your first love story remains always in someone´s heart, men´s and women´s heart.. :)

Anonymous said...

Star-crossed lovers... I feel so sorry for her

Anonymous said...

so touching and so pissing off... i feel sorry for you, for him, for your husband and for your previous boy. how could it all happen this way... ehh...

Nathalie said...

That was such a sad story that it aches in my heart. perhaps soulmates aren't meant for one another but it still hurts...

Lauren said...

That story was so powerful. I actually shivered. I can relate to having a soul-mate and not be meant for each other.

InspireMe said...

my heart just broke into pieces...

♥Clovegirl♥ said...

Goodness!!! When this happens, all you can do is live the present, remember the past with love... there are stories that never end... no matter what!
:)

Anonymous said...

Wow.

That made me start thinking of love, soulmates and everything that comes with it.

I hope you're happy with your life now, maybe it wasn't meant to be. Still, I think you are soulmates. Wow. This text is breathtaking.

Anonymous said...

This story makes my past clear...it lets me know that we are soulmates destined to be apart and in that we are not alone. Such a beautiful disaster...

Denise van der Roux said...

I know how you feel. I've been through the exact same thing. The only difference is that my soulmate died. Feels pretty fucked up.

amanda said...

God DAMN thats beatiful!

Anonymous said...

yes.. not for all the soulmates is ment to be together..

Emma said...

aw that's so sad, its heartbreakingly beautiful. i hope you are happy regardless.

maybe he wasn't a soulmate, maybe he was just someone to learn from and lead you to your soulmate. :)

Anonymous said...

This was so beautiful.

the girl in grey said...

So bittersweet.

Anonymous said...

im so scared this is my story too.

Anonymous said...

This is by far the best blog I've read today.

Anonymous said...

normally I think cheating on people is bad.
but in this case, I feel like I should urge you to do it?

...I really want you two to be together some how. even though I've never met either of you..
:) hmm. I hope things turn out good.
thank you for sharing.

Cocoon of Control said...

This was absolutely beautiful. <3

Ste said...

this is beautiful.



thank you very much for sharing :)

Anonymous said...

cute. so 14 year olds have business cards? lol. maybe a Mcdonald's napkin with his # scribbled on it. haha.

Anonymous said...

Only thing beautiful about this was the picture. Not a good idea to even emotionally cheat on your husband... Can't end good.

snowbirdling said...

I can't say I'm convinced this is a true story. 14 year olds with business cards and texts 10 years ago? According to the age, this person should be around 30 years old, but it doesn't seem like it's written by a 30 year old.

But maybe it's not supposed to matter whether or not it is true.

Bella said...

It makes sense- sometimes we can't end up with our souls mate. But it's only one of lifes injustices and I applaud you for not ruining your marriage. Your daughter, your husband, they were what was meant in your life. They are your lifes loves, and in their own way your souls true mate.

Anonymous said...

well. lets not be critical. this is a beautiful story.

im so sorry you two arent meant to be. maybe it was really the timing.

but perhaps it was just meant to be a memory. something to hold on to and smile when you think of it.

but nothing more.

no more cheating. this love made you lose a boyfriend once. dont make him lose your marriage as well. there's commitment and responsibility in this.

im sure you love your husband as well. do not give up in a moment of impulse

skg said...

Made me smile so big :)

Jessica said...

It's like you're telling my story.

I've known this boy since we were 13 but it's never the right time. It has never been the right time. And now I think it never will be.

Anonymous said...

I saw this at such a weird time. I've been on and off with the man i'm madly in love with for 3 years. I ended it the first couple times & he fought for me telling me we were soul mates. Then I came back to him because I believed we were meant to be. This time around he ended it a couple times, and he finally told me yesterday he thinks it's over for good. It's like we can't get in sync. Timing sucks. But everything happens for a reason, right?

Anna said...

Dear Sender,

Please listen to this Song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4hsdA_CfYQ

ohsogossamer said...

Hmmm perhaps timing, but whilst this is beautiful it irritates me...a lot!

If he's your soul mate perhaps you've just settled for less with your husband. I don't know you, obviously you love your husband to an extent but is that really enough? There's so much that bothers me with this...Good luck anyway.

Perhaps he's not your soul mate, you didn't end up together for a reason. Perhaps if you had ended up together it wouldn't have been as great or indredible or loving as you think it might have. Just be grateful for what you have don't think of the what could have been think of the what is and smile.

Clarisse said...

Owww... sad... very sad...
Timing really is everything...

What if...

makemeapologise said...

wow, this is (im)perfect.

Anonymous said...

oh my god. crying.

taylor knipe said...

sooo good.

but not a conversation to be had if you are married! how would your husband feel?

bad timing i guess :(

shopper-mania said...

This is sad. and touching

H said...

beautiful story, it's sad but at the same time very romantic.
One part of me, the creative part I suppose, would like to see a movie of this. That movie would be outstanding, like this story already is.

Anonymous said...

my hair on my arms raised in the end, this was so touching and beautiful.

Bubbles said...

thanks for all the comments on my entry. And rest assure, i will not cheat on my husband. I love him and yeah..welll, i just needed to sumbit the entry to get things off my chest. My husband knows about my so called soulmate and he's fine with it.,, in his words, ' he may be your soulmate and u didnt end up with him, because i am the love of your life, and thats why you're with me' =)
Oh and by the way, i'm 27. And yes he had a card coz he was in a band and stuff like that. Needed cards for gigs. Hehe.
Oh and

joyce. said...

Should be elaborated, it would be a great novel-turned-motion picture.

Clarice said...

"And you can't always get what you want.
Honey, you can't always get what you want.
You can't always get what you want.
But if you try sometimes, yeah,
You just might find you get what you need."

Anonymous said...

This is so sad and completely tore at my heart because I feel the same thing right now...

The Swedish New Yorker said...

So beautiful.

feefeee said...

hi bubbles...

great to see your reply. im sure you'll not cheat on your husband because he's the love of your life. Having talked to your ex-boyfriend 10 years later, even thru facebook shows that you have moved on and not still living in your past. Im glad that you're happily married now. All the best to u.

Samantha said...

Touched.

Anonymous said...

i put my tears on.i just broke up this day.
because i think : how is it like if i don't love him anymore,but 10 years l8r, i'm marriage,and he come and said that he still love me..

deep'nstuff said...

Wow, I just stumbled on this blog and I am smitten.

RuthlessChic said...

one of my favorites from tis blog!! crazy story

Anonymous said...

I really liked this story! It makes me believe in soulmates - even though you guys didn't ended up together...
But lovely and exiting story :)

Anonymous said...

Nicely written. You had me hanging on. But this guy sounds like a JERK. I wonder how many other girls he's tried to contact.

Now he's trying to have you cheat on your husband. You gave him the BEST answer - maybe in another lifetime.

Anonymous said...

amazing and touching text. its like in a movie, youre so strong!

frankenstein said...

this had me on the edge of my seat! check out my writing if you have time!

http://mymomentsmuse.blogspot.com/

under the playing with words tab

xxo

The Midnight Owl said...

star cross'd lovers. this breaks my heart

Anonymous said...

thank you.
i met this guy, i thought he was my soulmate really. i still do.
and all the other guys i have met since, none of them has touched my heart in that way.
i will never forget him.

Ana said...

Me pasa exactamente lo mismo!! hace 10 aƱos lo conozco y cada uno tiene su pareja y familia. Muy buenos tus escritos, besos

Anonymous said...

that's what exactly happened to me.

Anonymous said...

same here... sometimes i wonder, why do we only realize that person is our soulmate only after we're in a committed relationship... My breaks again after reading this... Thanks for sharing your stories

Ashwath Segu said...

A really touching story. Cute in a way, but I guess it wasn't meant to be! :( It really touched my heart and I feel bad for you though. But be happy with what you have, right? Everything happens for a reason :)

I was telling my girlfriend this story and she was really touched by it too and she thinks it's the cutest story she's ever heard.

All the best to you! :)

l said...

How could you do this to dad MUM!! He deserves better!

Jayne Cha said...

I know this story. This is my story.

connie walker said...

very touching story I enjoyed it thank you for shearing

Anonymous said...

nice story :')

buy viagra said...

I really liked your blog and would like to know more about the topic
viagra online
generic viagra

thank you very much..

Anonymous said...

oh my god.. that is such a wonderful story :)

SSASS said...

THIS IS WHAT LOVE DO...THEY ARE FOR AWAY BUT STILL TOGETHER LEAVING IN HEARTS.

girl in the box said...

that's a really beautiful sad story.
but, when those things happen, I always think: "everything happens for a reason", and if you think a bit, it actually makes sense.

hugs ♥

p.s.:really awesome blog, keep up the good work ;)

Mimi said...

the story of my life! except in mine no words where ever exchanged about what was actually happening and things just screwed up.

Fancy Dress Costumes said...

What a beautiful story, made me cry with happiness :)

Anonymous said...

I'd love to tell you my story sometime. I just googled to see if anyone else experienced what I am going through because I feel so alone, and this was the first thing I saw. I am married, and I love my husband dearly, but he is not my soulmate. I know this because I have already met my soulmate. Never was I so in sync with a person, or could I read, or have my thoughts read the way I could with this person, yet somehow it was impossible to make a relationship with him work because all it was was endless heartache. And heartache is a deadly disease that is not good for any soul. Our moments together were usually far and few between, but the impact each encounter left on me was always so unforgettable and endearing. I will never forget this person, and maybe some day we can cross paths when it won't hurt so much, but I am committed in a loving marriage, and refuse to let my marriage suffer because of a memorable past that wasn't meant to be.

Anonymous said...

This is the most beautiful thing I've ever read. I rooting for you guys.

Courtney said...

The right people that met at the wrong time.. It happens to the best of us. ANd I'll always wonder- WHy ???

Hippie clothing said...

I agree with Courtney..It happens when right people meet in wrong time.
Its a heart touching story, which gives us a live example of soul mates feelings. I simply pray God that soul mates like you should never be departed but live happily for each other with each other..

Spa Uniforms said...

Really heart touching.. Making to remember my past..