Sunday, May 15, 2011

I will always love you


I'm writing you this letter because I can't do this anymore. I love you so much. I miss you everyday. I've been wondering if you've been thinking about me... will you ever want me again? will you every love me again like you did? These are questions I ask myself over and over again, but they're questions that will never be answered at this point. I can't keep wondering anymore. It's not fair that you've moved on and I have been stuck in the same spot, afraid to move. I know I'm doing it to myself, I have been for far too long. Even though the thought of not speaking to you scares me, I have to do it for myself. I can't be your friend and act like I'm okay when I'm not just for the sake of still having you in my life... You used to tell me you would never get over me, that you could see yourself with me for a very long time. If those feelings were strong and true then they must still be in you and maybe one day you'll be able to express them again. But I have to stop thinking about how it was with you because its gone.. I feel like a fool for holding on this long. Am I a fool? Or a person who is just truly in love? I have to let you go H.. I've been avoiding this for four months and I know I could probably keep it up for a long time but I need to be strong and take this stand... Thank you for being one of the greatest things that came into my life. Thank you for teaching me so much about myself. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. I can never hate you because I know that everything you did was out of love, but I hate that it had to end. I even hate that I can't wish or hope you will come back to me anymore. Talking to you and seeing you will just set me back no matter how much I tell myself it won't.
I miss you so much & I always will.
I hope you accomplish every goal you set for yourself, I hope you figure out everything you were unsure about, and I hope above all that you are happy.
I wish I could be there to see it all happen.
But the reality is, you left me
& now its time for me to let go.

I will always love you,
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