Tuesday, October 6, 2009

and so i wonder.


He said he would be there for me,
He said he would never leave me,
No one knows how i feel deep inside,
No one was there when it happened in real life,
Some say I left for another guy,
Some say I left because I've had enough,
I left because everything became different,
Him and i became different,
Our love is like a shattered glass now,
Our love could never grow again,
He moved on,
I couldn't,
He came back,
I came back,
He moved on,
I moved on..
I'm tired of crying for him,
Because I know he won't cry for me,
He blames me for everything,
He doesn't blame himself,
I keep it inside,
I carry with me all the burden too,
I don't want to look back anymore,
For I Don't want to cry over him again,
I don't want to fight back for him,
Because I know he won't hear me,
And he chooses to not hear me,
I moved on..
It's all been done,
I'm someone new now,
So don't come looking for me now, (well,to tell you the truth,he never did. never tried)
Live a life full of smiles and happiness,
Go out without telling anyone about it and feel blessed,
I thanked the lord for changing me into someone new,
Something worthwhile and got rid of all my blues,
He can keep everything,
I can keep the memories,
I ask for nothing,
Everything is done.

I did this when i was young. there's something about this that i could never forget of what happened. i hope you are reading this Keem Musdi. to know how much pain you've caused me and i to you. you and i both know the truth. there's no easy way to say sorry but to rather lie to ourselves and build up those hatred inside of the two of us.

And so i wonder if you do still think about me.
And so i wonder if you do still love me inside somewhere.
And so i wonder if there will ever be another chance for us to tie the knot and never let go.
And so i wonder.
And so i wonder.

I never got the chance to say thank you. I know I'll never be given the chance to apologize eventhough i've apologized millions of times (i assure you i can apologize a million more just for you. let me apologize. I don't want to carry this burden anymore). i don't think i'll ever have the chance to do so. wherever you are. i hope sooner or later maybe someday,everything will be okay again.

- Fee.W

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