Sunday, August 4, 2013

seeing is believing

Photo via dearlleila

Do you know what it’s like to long for affection and love from the person who has your heart?
To hang off every word they say, every move they make..
In the beginning its okay... two years later... a girl wants and needs more.
Sometimes when I see a couple in public showing each other affection I cry.
I think because it's like seeing your dreams in front of you but they’re not quite your own.
You’re not that girl, he’s not that guy.

Is that the answer to the question which repeatedly runs through my head?
“I’m not that girl, he’s not that guy”
And if that is the answer... What do I do?
Do I accept him for the guy he is and try and be the girl I need to be?
Is it so bad to long for late night chats, random “I love yous” and kisses on my forehead?
Does that make me needy?
Sometimes I feel ashamed. I feel like I should be stronger.
He regularly tells me he loves me. I know he does.

But seeing is believing. I used the analogy the other night that a paraplegic may know how to skateboard but it doesn’t necessarily mean that he will ever be able to show you. At the time it made sense to me, but now that I have retyped it, it makes no sense at all.

Basically what I was saying is that I need to be shown that I am loved.
Then I wonder if he was that kind of guy would I love him?
He says he will try, he has said it over the past two years but nothing has ever changed.

I’m not sure that I am happy. In fact, sometimes I feel like I am miserable. But I love him more than I have ever loved.

Just a girl, standing in front of a guy, begging him to love her.


  1. I would love too see other comments to this.I'm in a situation that is more or less the same.his affection and compassion is perfect.but sometimes hes prioritising is not what I want.maybe it is asking for too much or maybe I need to change (him).love is not easy.As you wrote he doesn't even have the capability to give you the affection you need.If you been having a relationship with him for 2 years and nothing changed,you are the one who need to change,him.there are more fishes in the sea and you deserve someone who can give you what you need.otherwise you will be spending your life miserable with someone incapable of showing emotions.

  2. Love is never easy, it's always the most toughest emotion, one one hand there are people who have to wait wait in pain and agony to feel love and on the other, there are those who have the chance and just blow it..

  3. I've never been in love before but this really intrigues me because it relates to another type of love present in my life. I can sure understand that inattainability and longing for the ideals to happen. Gosh, I wish it would just happen. :-(

  4. Don't give up, don't walk away.... Don't make the same mistake I made... You will surely regret if you lose him.... As long as you love him, don't GIve uP.

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    This is the true wedding film of two couples who portrays true love. Two different people, physically but united as one in heart.

    credits to the man who never failed to capture every moment to perfectly, Mr. Jason Magabanua check out his videos

  7. We all have our own cross to bear :)

  8. Why settle? You should never have to PUT UP WITH anything. If you crave the passion and it's not there, why training yourself to live with it? If that's what you deserve, need for your life.. don't settle for less. Ever.


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