Tuesday, March 5, 2013
ph: The Gentleman Amateur
For the first time in 3 years I felt like we got to the spot we were suppose to be at before we got lost.
The first 4 months of our relationship was so fast but I remember almost every moment in slow motion realizing what we had early on was not to be forgotten. When we first met, I remember you went around the table introducing yourself and saying hello to every person except for me. Lastly you looked at me with the enticing look I am sure I returned you with, thinking, we both knew there was more to this encounter then hello. Sitting through the movie all I could think about was who you were and the future ahead of us, a future I knew that was undeniably avoidable. I wasn’t sure of the future, no one is ever, but at that time I knew my future contained you in some manner. Within a weeks time we were at our first outing with a group of friends at a baseball game. Our conversation was filled with nothing but laughter. The night ended in holding hands and butterflies under the fireworks. The rest of the summer wasn’t any different then the first night. You were always a gentleman and held doors, you became my best friend and we shared stories most would not. But in the midst of the sprint we made through the summer together, we finished apart. No one winning the race.
Over the next 3 years we struggled finding a spot back in each other’s lives. Fighting lust, love and life, never truly finding a place.
We both had dated others and tried moving on and blindly ignoring the problem at hand.
We both just needed to find a way move on.
I started seeing someone recently and for the first time I hadn’t thought about you.
Until I did.
We just got off the phone for the first time in months today. We caught up about work, family and life, when you brought up my love life. I hesitated………. but then I broke the ice, talking about my issues and asking for your thoughts. All I wanted was my best friend, your, advice. You spearheaded the conversation with thoughtful and honest guidance creating a path of conversation I never thought we would be able to consume. The talk felt natural, pure and sincere. We ended the call with best regards for each other and a plan to catch a friendly ball game with friends in the future.
Finally I found the spot I believe you were always meant for.
Content as close friends.