Wednesday, March 7, 2012

what heartache was

heart break hands
ph: submitter's own

i found this many years ago. before i had even met him. before i had even dreamed i would find a man who could take my breath away and make me feel so utterly complete like he did. anyways, back then, before i even knew what heartache was i bookmarked this, pasting it into a document and shortly then forgetting about it. now, three and a half years later, now that i'm counting days (32) we have been apart, instead of days we have been together, i come across this:

"someone once told me it was comparable to death. to mourn the loss of a loved one. cause really in your life, they are dead. left only with the memories to play over again. i still don’t understand how you’re supposed to stop ever loving someone? to be everything one day and nothing the next. i don’t get it? but i think it was best stated in everwood...

What you're feeling right now Amy, it doesn't ever really go away -- not completely. It's not like, ya know, you're gonna go back to being the person you were before they died -- the person's gone. It's more like something inside of you breaks and your body finds a way to compensate for it. Like if you busted your right hand, you figure out how to use the left one. And sure, you might resist for awhile because you're pissed off that you have to learn all this stuff again that nobody else does. Eventually your body takes over and figures it out for you. And you’re glad. Because if it was up to you . . . you'd look at your broken hand forever and try to figure out what it was like before"



  1. I (and many of my friends) have been through that, but believe me, there's a magical point at the two-month mark. There'll still be heartbreak, but things will seem infinitely better than they did before. Time heals all wounds, it's just a pity you can't speed up time.

  2. @Micaela,

    I think that's a question we'd all love to be able to answer -- and most likely never will fully.

    My Blog:

  3. I remember those times when I also forgot how to breathe.. it's like.. they were once your air and now that they're gone you don't know where to look for options.. but at the end you will realize that you still got an option but it's up to you if you will use it or not..

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  5. I would like to respond to the idea of losing somebody you love being like they died. It is not the same at all. I say this as a person whose husband has died. Death is forever, which oddly enough makes it easier to get over in a strange sort of way. About the time my husband died, a women I knew got divorced, for years after that she was desperately looking for a man in her life, somebody to validate her as being worth loving. I never felt this way at all. So I think sometimes losing somebody through death, however tragic, does not mess up the survivor in the same way as a divorce.

  6. My boyfriend's crazy ex once compared her pain similar to a death. A death is so much worse. Him not wanting to be with you is a decision, and it sucks, but you move on.

  7. that picture looks just like my cup of care! and look.. it's empty!


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