Monday, August 16, 2010
no easy way out
Why do I have to be the bad guy? Breaking up isn't always bad, right? What if breaking up was the only option? What if breaking up was the best option?
Most people don't appreciate that the person choosing to initiate the break-up has it really hard. Sure, whenever we picture someone dumping someone, we picture them as the dick who ruined the relationship because they didn't care enough or they wanted someone else more. But what if the person ending the relationship is the brave one? They're the one who is willing to accept the responsibility. They're willing to say, "This is the right choice for both of us."
What's the best option between breaking your best friend's heart now, or not wanting to hurt them now and hurting them even more later? Bite the bullet. Take the hit. It's painful, like a plunge into ice cold water. But like the body, your heart and mind slowly adjust to the change in atmosphere. You know that you're there alone, and you're making the decision for two people, but you've got to be sure it's the right one. And you are sure that it's the right one. Or at least that's what you hope.
But why the hell does having the guts to be honest make you a bad person? Why does it have to mean that you've victimized the other person somehow? Sure, he's hurting right now. But I know that I'm hurting knowing I've hurt him. I still wouldn't take it back, knowing I couldn't make myself love him and knowing I'd just make him more unhappy later.
There's no easy way out, but I'm not a villain for making the choice. Don't make the mistake that this decision was easy for me.