Saturday, January 2, 2010

if there is something i believe in...


Do you believe in what people call ‘soulmates’? I, for one, do not. I’ve been told my way of looking at love is cynical but I don’t think so. I believe that a person call fall in love with anyone, given the timing is right. People fall in and out of your life, I don’t believe in destiny, things happen for no reason and you are left to try to control it - although you know you can’t. I only try to convince myself things are meant to be when something negative happens. But in the end, I don’t think it works like that.

My friends are not my friends because they are better than other people - I’ve learned to love them by being around them and getting to know them. If I spent time with most people, granted they weren’t extremely rude and had no interest in me, I could probably love them just as much as I love my friends now.

But somethings I find harder to explain, like the way you can meet people who just feel right for you. But then again, this might also be coincidence - and timing. But it is all so very shallow. I wish I could look at people and oversee their physical appearance. But of course that’s not possible. But if it was, I really wonder what I’d see.

But do not mistake me, if there is something I believe in it is love.

- K


  1. I do not think you are being cynical at all. That is actually rational and logical. There has to more than just physical attraction in a relationship to work, and I think physical attraction is what people mistake for "soulmates" or "destiny". You need someone who is like-mined and stable, and that is not always the person whom you would have thought of as your soul-mate!

  2. I understand what you mean
    but for me, the one thing i don't believe in is love.
    weird. yet i keep returning to this page and continue to read it.
    the kind of love i don't believe in is the one between two strangers who meet each other. I believe it's an illusion. and that we're just simply caught up in the moment
    because in many cases, years later, we look back and wonder how we could have ever felt that way about the person.

  3. love this. check out my blog /:)

  4. This is really honest and really true , i know excactly what she means. I wish that something more than just looks out there.

  5. I'm actually undecided on the issue of soulmates. On one hand it does seem like a Hallmark created concept, but on the other hand... I'm a romantic and when you just connect with someone immediately, it kind of makes me believe? Maybe I should just stop analysing and defining and just go with what feels right.

    "I like the word 'soul' and I like the word 'mate'...other than that, you got me kid"

  6. agreed agreed agreed. love does not exist between strangers. "love is friendship on fire" no? yes. soulmates-no. love-hellz to the yes. but you have to know a person first. of course you do.

  7. agreed. if people were "soulmates" there wouldn't be divorces everyday. love needs to be worked on, and it needs attention. just falling in love and saying you found your "soulmate" doesn't cut it.

  8. To the immediate attraction without explanation you spoke of, one of my favorite songs:
    "They say that love is just a chemical reaction
    I say that makes this all too hard to explain"
    by a.j. roach&sung by robbie hecht
    look it up! :)

  9. Absolutely! I think there are plenty of people you can fall in love with and end up with, there' no such thing as "the one" person for you. That's why celebrities all get together - if there was just one person for each of us, it'd be too much of a coincidence that both are superstars playing lovers in the same movie eh?

  10. Anonymous said
    "the kind of love i don't believe in is the one between two strangers who meet each other. I believe it's an illusion. and that we're just simply caught up in the moment because in many cases, years later, we look back and wonder how we could have ever felt that way about the person."

    On the contray, when I look back, I still have the 'loving feeling' though he clearly didn't and left. That's what happen when you fall in love with 'strangers', people you do not know really well. Maybe I just gotta wait a couple more years.

  11. In almost complete agreement with this post.
    Rings quite true for some, I think.

  12. I agree with you I don't believe in soul mates and I also believe that love is different with every person; different types of love.


  13. This is exactly my mind.

    Everything else, I've lost hope in. But for some inane reason, the only thing I still believe in is love. True amazing imperfect love. I believe it will come to each and every one of us and when it does, it will be beautiful and amazing and earth shattering.

  14. some times i meet people out and you just conect with them, they see the world just like you see it and it feels good. but as for the romatic soul mate, you will have to come back to me on that one, as just recovered from my last soul destroying relationship breakup!!!

  15. This was the best thing I have heard in months! Thank you for writing this! :D

  16. That's so true. I think just like you. But sometimes I still hope that there is something more, that some things really happens for a reason. :)

  17. With all honesty, when I read that, it was like reading a transcript of what I say myself when I'm talking to someone about love and soulmates and destiny...

  18. yes there a friends you learn to love but then again there are friends u love uncoditionally no?
    Like ur best friends... the sort u can't do without....
    Don't u ever think may be just may be they were actually sent here for u just like u were sent here for them.

  19. woah i really get this. but i suppose im more a believer of coincidences and chances, last paragraph makes the most sense to me, physical appearance is just a way of finding wether you might have something in commen with them, but its so mch more interesting to see how someone is, how they move then you get it.

  20. There's a difference between falling in love and finding your soulmate. Yes, it's true that many people fall in and out of love several times in their life. It's also true that many of those people confuse love with infatuation.

    I don't think everyone finds their soulmate. I think it's a very rare thing and if you think it's impossible to even see past a person's physical appearance then you probably won't find yours. Just because you've found yours doesn't mean you don't have to work on your relationship either.

    I didn't truly believe in fate until I understood it. Everything does happen for a reason, those reasons jut aren't always revealed to you immediately.

  21. Hi! c: I've just found this blog spot, and being new to this here's something that might or might not change your mind-it changed mine, at least!
    Two and a half years ago, I started chasing after a boy, and in doing so began playing a silly online game because he did. We ended up mutualistically deciding that a makeout session was needed promptly! However, a relationship was not. Out of boredom and slight interest, I kept playing the game, and a few months later, I recieved a message from someone the 'rules' reguarded as restricting our two 'players' from talking.
    Now, this may sound silly and naieve now, though.. It was a sudden impulse of his to create a new trial of the game just to talk to me. =] I was flattered, of course, but also slightly wary, as many others may be.
    Disreguarding my instincts, I continued talking to him, and we got to 'know each other'.
    I'm not completely sure if this qualifies, but we're still dating to this day, and by coincidence I've never, ever met anyone who is or could ever be more compatable with me. I mean, down to what we read, our childhood past-times, and practically everything in common now. Haha =] except that I don't like him biting his nails, and he doesn't like me dressing up small dogs!

    =] oh, btw! I am in America and he was in Australia! Cute!

  22. you speak the truth.

  23. couldn't have said it better myself. love is crazy yes but your right its all about timing. "soulmates" not sure about all that but i am sure there are people on in this world made for one another.

  24. Thank you for this. Soo true.

  25. I'd like to see who we approach, who we befriend and who we (let ourselves) love if we were all blind. Can we perhaps replicate that by doing the exact opposite of what our eyes initially tells us about a person? (within reason) Like date someone who looks like no one you hang out with. Or maybe not do the exact opposite, but keep that information at bay...

  26. I've, like a normal human being, succumbed to the physical attraction in finding someone interesting or not. Very novice mistake but thank god I've learn from my mistake (I hope I do) but it would be very interesting and scary at the same time to see beyond their physical appearance.

  27. this picture should be credited to Urban Outfitters. It's from their catalog.

  28. you think that only because you havent found yours yet

  29. I think you can (and will!) all in always be able to fall in love with people, soulmates or not. I've not completely decided on the issue, if there are such things as soulmates or not.
    However, I'd like to believe there is such a thing. And even if I haven't completely decided on what I think (probably because my head and heart constantly have arguments when it comes to this and can never quite agree with each other) I think a big part of me do believe in soulmates.

    I've been in love a few times, you know the college-kinda-teenager-loves most of us have at least once in our lives. BUT if the whole soulmate thing is for real - well then I met mine about 3,5 years ago.
    Completely wrong timing; both were in relationships, we lived in different countries and our lifes were'nt compatible in any way.. Other than we both just knew that "this person has changed me. Has changed everything I am and that I believe in." And no, we didn't instantly fall in love, it was this very odd feeling.. I was drawn to him, he was drawn to me, as if we belonged to each other. Like two pieces of a jigsaw. And every second I spent with him, started to know who he was, I learnt who I were. We spoke without words, our hearts whispered to each other in a language we didnt quite understand, but it was unavoidable and obvious. And we had absolutely no say.

    We became the best of friends. And then, we fell in love. Our history is long, with an incredible amount of ups and downs. We've stopped talking, we've argued, we've loved, we've cried, we've laughed... The only thing we've never done; Forgetting. How do you forget the one person in the world that is your HOME? When I'm with him, everything makes sense, I have a purpose. My existence suddenly matters in a way it has never done before. And I know, he will be the only one that can ever make me feel that way.

    We are still not together. After almost 4 years. But we're finally getting there. The timing back then when we first met was horrible. But I think the wait made us into the persons we needed to be to finally find our way to be together. But finally it seems our lives are changing; they're starting to come together, slowly, bit by bit.. But we are getting there. Suddenly it happens. And you think - maybe, maybe this was all meant to be after all? Maybe soulmates do exist?

    If they do, I've found mine. And life may throw a lot of difficulties upon us, it has so far without doubts, but as long as you believe, I believe life will sort itself out in the end.

    And I can't wait for the day when I can shout out to the world; This is my man. And We belong together!

  30. Well said. I don't agree with everything, but at least I think I understand you


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