Tuesday, October 6, 2009

and so i wonder.


shes_jack

He said he would be there for me,
He said he would never leave me,
No one knows how i feel deep inside,
No one was there when it happened in real life,
Some say I left for another guy,
Some say I left because I've had enough,
No...
I left because everything became different,
Him and i became different,
Our love is like a shattered glass now,
Our love could never grow again,
He moved on,
I couldn't,
He came back,
I came back,
He moved on,
I moved on..
I'm tired of crying for him,
Because I know he won't cry for me,
He blames me for everything,
He doesn't blame himself,
I keep it inside,
I carry with me all the burden too,
I don't want to look back anymore,
For I Don't want to cry over him again,
I don't want to fight back for him,
Because I know he won't hear me,
And he chooses to not hear me,
I moved on..
It's all been done,
I'm someone new now,
So don't come looking for me now, (well,to tell you the truth,he never did. never tried)
Live a life full of smiles and happiness,
Go out without telling anyone about it and feel blessed,
I thanked the lord for changing me into someone new,
Something worthwhile and got rid of all my blues,
He can keep everything,
I can keep the memories,
I ask for nothing,
Everything is done.

I did this when i was young. there's something about this that i could never forget of what happened. i hope you are reading this Keem Musdi. to know how much pain you've caused me and i to you. you and i both know the truth. there's no easy way to say sorry but to rather lie to ourselves and build up those hatred inside of the two of us.

And so i wonder if you do still think about me.
And so i wonder if you do still love me inside somewhere.
And so i wonder if there will ever be another chance for us to tie the knot and never let go.
And so i wonder.
And so i wonder.

I never got the chance to say thank you. I know I'll never be given the chance to apologize eventhough i've apologized millions of times (i assure you i can apologize a million more just for you. let me apologize. I don't want to carry this burden anymore). i don't think i'll ever have the chance to do so. wherever you are. i hope sooner or later maybe someday,everything will be okay again.

- Fee.W

24 comments:

  1. I adore Jack Rivera (shes_jack) her photography, and this post, are absolutely breathtaking.

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  3. so hopeless and heartbreaking, i do wish you can go over it, because sometimes it's as my mother says and i totally agree with her 'anyone that makes you cry for a while and don't give a shit isn't worth it'

    so i hope you really really move on.

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  4. I remember writing a piece like this when I was younger. that wonder can get to you.
    I really appreciate this post!
    live strong
    live happy

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  5. this post was just heartbreaking. and yet inspirational. (: it lets all of us know that we all go through so much hurt. and anyway, if it was meant to be, it will be. (: that something I live by.

    www.loverandme.blogspot.com

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  6. i dont know what to say, but it hurts, and I feel the same way.

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  7. I wonder the same things too sometimes..but I'll never know, and don't really want to. Nice entry

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  8. This i very true about me and my former best friend. This i excactly how i feel about our friendship except for the fact that this 'poem' is talking about love.

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  9. Omg, Ive been through exactly the same thing and I feel the exact same thing about it. That is so weird, I thought I was alone out there with all the guilt over ruining something beautiful...

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  10. first thing i did was google "Keem Musdi", and what do you know i found one on facebook. don't know if it's the same one though:plol

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  11. After reading your post, I started crying. These past weeks, I've been going through almost the same thing, thinking the same thing. It's hard, but I hope you can overcome this and come out stronger than before.

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  12. so hopeless and heartbreaking, i do wish you can go over it

    - tell me about it... heartbreaks are almost like loan modification schemes... :(

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  13. i really really love this post:)

    and so as your other post..

    and there i was, following you now:)

    keep it up..

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  14. yea i used to wonder... wonder what if i had taken the other path. but now i'm happy with where i am. who i am with. all i can do now is pray for him on that other path and hope he can be as happy as me. cause maybe if i had fought harder for him, or maybe if he had fought harder for me, we might have still been together. but he didn't. and i didn't. but who i'm with now is trying. and i'm trying. and i think effort in a relationship is just as important as the love.

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  15. beautifully written, took the words out of my heart.

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  16. it same goes to me. thanks for the post :)

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  17. this photo is gorgeous. oddly enough, my favorite part of it is how you can just barely tell her sweatshirt is red. something about that is amazing to me.

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  18. I wondered too... but he cheated...he lied.... he became tarnished in a way that I would never have imagined.

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  19. "Our love is like shattered glass." That's a very vivid description. It's always tough when people change. Great poem. I really enjoyed it.

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  20. I found so much useful data in this post!

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